Not Anymore
by DarkAngelOfSorrowReturns
Summary: Newly weds are supposed to be happy and enjoying life, but it's not always like that. Narcissa learns that. Can she change it? AU!Abusive Lucius. Warnings for domestic/Verbal abuse.


**A/N: Written for The Houses Competition forum.**

 **House:** Hufflepuff

 **Category:** Themed- Discovery

 **Prompt:** "You will stay here until I give you permission to leave." [Speech]

 **Word Count:** 1,114

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

Glass shattered on the wall next to Narcissa. She flinched and turned away; her lip quivered as she gave a sideways look to her husband. It was their first night in the manor after the honeymoon, and the compassion Lucius had presented in Venice had turned bitter.

"I didn't ask for an advisor on my business matters," he drawled coldly. Lucius wiped the sleeve of his robe as if he had dirtied himself with the task of throwing the glass.

Narcissa swallowed in an effort to remove the lump in her throat and nodded, "It won't happen again."

"See to it that it won't." Lucius looked her over before shaking his head, "Don't call for the House Elves. You're going to clean up this mess yourself, foolish wench." With a sharp turn, Lucius walked out of the study.

Narcissa quickly wiped the single tear that cascaded down her cheek and knelt to the pile of glass pieces. She picked them up gingerly, feeling regret in her veins. It was her fault that Lucius had acted that way. If she hadn't come in and offered her counsel, then Lucius wouldn't have snapped; Narcissa would learn to be careful with her choice of words.

That night when Narcissa slipped under the covers next to Lucius in their bed, Lucius wrapped an arm around her waist and murmured an apology in his sleep. He couldn't take back what he said to her; but Narcissa thought that, with time, things would get better.

Sad to say, the marriage had not gotten better. It had been a year, and Narcissa had yet to bear a child, so it was like walking on eggshells with a man who was impatiently wanting an heir. Any toe she stepped out of his 'line' and Narcissa was cleaning something broken off the floor. He treated her worse than a House Elf; but he didn't put his hands on her. Instead, he slapped her with words.

His reasons for his actions are stated as, 'getting a thicker skin', but Narcissa's skin was as flimsy as parchment. Any jab, insult, or judgement that spouted from Lucius' mouth towards her would cause Narcissa to cry; but she believed it all to be true. Narcissa wasn't strong nor brave. It was the life she would live until things would progress for the better.

Except they didn't get better. Another year passed by, and Narcissa still couldn't conceive an heir for Lucius. With her personal House Elf Muffy by her side, Narcissa brought Lucius his tea in the study. She set it down as Lucius silently continued to work and poured him a cup. Narcissa tried to be as quick and efficient as she could, but fate was cruel and made her trip, spilling the tea on Lucius' work.

His eyes turned to slits as he broke the quill in his hand. "Are you incapable of performing even the remedial type of work?" Lucius stood up and demanded. He looked to the steaming pot on his desk and knocked it with force over in her direction. She expected the pot to fly next to her as it always does, so when the hot sensation of the tea scalded her chest, Narcissa gasped and fell to the floor. The realization that he hit her, even through an object, numbed Narcissa's senses; she didn't hear the structure of the pot break in front of her.

She saw Lucius look on with wide eyes at what he had done yet his face showed nothing else; this was the first time his strikes physically touched her, but he couldn't appear as weak. Weakness was not an option, not even in front of his wife.

"Make sure you or your elf clean this pitiful mess up." Lucius cleared his throat and stood up from his chair. "You will stay here until I give you permission to leave." He started to leave, but her next words made him stop at the door.

She was doing as she was told, picking up the pieces of the teapot, but something in Narcissa snapped. She was better than this; she was no commoner and would not be treated as such, especially by the man who was supposed to love her. Narcissa's eyes welled up with tears as her hands clenched into fists, drawing blood from the glass in her hands. She turned and looked up to the monster standing at the study doors. "I. Am. _Not_. Your. Slave!"

"What did you say?" Lucius asked in a calm, low voice.

Narcissa rose from the floor, feeling empowered rather than pained from the burns on her chest. "I did not stutter, Lucius."

Lucius narrowed his eyes. "How dare you-"

"I have done nothing but do your bidding for two years! I deserve more than this!"

"I deserve a son."

"I deserve happiness!" Narcissa's cheeks were red and splotchy from the tears she shed. "I am not taking your verbal lashings any longer. Merlin so help me if things don't change I will honor the vow 'til death do we part'."

She watched as the expressions on Lucius' face started to fight against one another; the softness in his features showed Narcissa that the compassionate man she shared a honeymoon with two years ago.

"Cissa, I…" Lucius touched her cheek lightly. "...I apologize. I allowed my father's teachings and the stress of an heir to cause me to nearly tarnish the delicacy that I adore about you."

Narcissa leaned into his hand, letting out a small breath. "You did tarnish it, Lucius."

Lucius frowned and cleared his throat. "Is there anything I can do?"

"A healer for my upper torso would suffice for now."

With a direct nod towards the terrified House Elf still in the room, Lucius took Narcissa's hands. "Can you accept my apology, Cissa?"

"Yes." Narcissa nodded. "With time." And she did; discovering the inner courage inside of her helped Narcissa do that. Time went by, and they managed to move past the darkness that had been present in their first few years of marriage. Narcissa fell pregnant and they were both overcome with joy. The celebration lasted all night and they were happy.

As Narcissa cradled her pregnant belly, she thought back to how her life had been before. She knew that it would still be like that if she hadn't had the courage to stand up to Lucius and bring him back to the way he had been on their honeymoon. Now, as she hummed to the little boy growing inside of her, Narcissa knew that Lucius would do whatever he could to make sure both she and their son were happy and healthy.


End file.
